The post man just knocked on the door. A parcel for me? How exciting, I’d ordered it so I knew exactly what was in it! Ooo, a letter, for me equally exciting! I discarded the parcel and set to opening the letter. It took me a moment to realise what it was, my p45. Ooh.
This is the first time in my life that I’m technically unemployed.
I’m going to be a Stay at Home Mum
There I’ve said it. That’s it my decision has been made.
It took months of deliberation, well six to be precise, and that’s not counting all the pregnant months. We discussed me going back part time and sharing the childcare between us. Dave always said he’d do a couple of days if I wanted to go back. After four years of odd jobs, training and a lot of hard work, Dave became a self employed plumber at the start of the year. We both decided in the end that he’ll earn more to support us as a family than what I would part time.
This will be my first month without a pay cheque since I was 16! I think this is going to be the hardest part to deal with. I’ll have to be reliant on Dave for anything money related. We’ve always had a good system in place for bills and food, it’s going to feel weird that I’m not going to contribute towards it.
So I’m Lucky, Yes?
The answer deep down has to be a yes. Of course I am, who wouldn’t want to see every little step their bundles of joy take?
I realise how lucky I am to get a choice. Dave is giving me this opportunity to stay at home and look after my son, some couples/single Mums don’t get this luxury. It doesn’t stop me having this niggle, one that makes me question whether I would want to go back to work, just a couple of days a week, have a bit of grown up time?
It is the days that I have nowhere to go that I wonder can I handle the day in day out of looking after the Robot. Cleaning up after him and doing the household chores.
The Robot is ten months old, I’ve got through the harder early baby days, and I can see the potential as he moves ever closer to walking and talking. I know he will bring me more entertainment in the day, more cuddles, and love. I know I’ll convince him to “help” me with the chores, we’ll be a mini team him and I. I know as he gets older things will change, he’ll be more interactive, it doesn’t mean I can’t question whether I’m doing the right thing!
My Mind is Made Up
Since turning to blogging the decision has become easier to accept. I’m like a hawk, I’ve spotted Stay at Home Mum posts a mile off. These are the ones that have helped with the process of acceptance. Safe with the knowledge that other Mums do it I can now declare myself a stay at home Mum.
Rest assured I think there will be plenty of adventures to share along the way.
What is your experience about becoming a stay at home mum? Has it been easy? Do you regret it? Do you fill your days with activities or get lost in an empty vat? Please let me know!